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My coming out "no friends" post has 4.4M views...

I was expecting that maybe a few supportive indie makers would leave some comments, a bunch more likes, maybe a few new people would show up and that's it.

In my wildest dreams, I hadn't expected these numbers of views, followers and most importantly, messages from real humans wanting to connect with me.

And now I don't know how to manage it. I don't even know what the amount is and how to fit it into my daily schedule.

What I do know is that anyone who put in the effort to contact me deserves even a simple short answer.

I think I need to plan some time-based sessions to sit, read and reply back.

I wanted to keep it private, just my own experience I'll hold in my heart forever but I just can't.

Something tells me that there's someone who needs to read this.

Cynical people will comment I'm doing this for self-promotion, they know better about everything, so I'll let them be the sentencing judge in my case but I know my truth.

I went to sleep late yesterday as I wasn't sleepy at all, since my "no friends" post started to gain more and more attention. So I was hoping that on Sunday I'd sleep longer to reduce sleep debt but I couldn't.

Spent some time hoping I'd fall asleep again but nope, I had to get up, it was almost 6:00 AM. I took my iPad where I have an app to read my weight and body fat to take measures and did something I never do.

I took it with me to the bathroom, I keep the scale in the living room as we have a small bathroom without much space, and felt the urge to just briefly check what's up on X.

I saw a few DM notifications, I went into my inbox and after a few seconds, a new message popped up! It was Andrew Huberman with the most absurd message I could think about at that time. It was so surreal I sat down on the toilet and started to breathe heavily.

I thought, it's a fake account but then how would it land in my main inbox? I tapped on the name to see, it was real.

My heart started to race, I was out of breath, literally a full-blown shock reaction. I didn't know what's going on with me, all I was able to reply with shaking hands was "Hi"

This lasted several minutes, I couldn't get back to myself for quite some time and then after I told my wife what happened to me (she's not using X and didn't know any details of what I'm doing here).

Then it hit me so hard, I realized what was happening...

My entire life I was carrying inner pain, numbing it one way or another and running away from it trying to be in control of everything that would disturb my protection.

When in recent months the pain grew to an unbearable level I stopped bullshitting myself. Became vulnerable in front of myself, in front of my wife and in front of you, the entire world.

I met with the shadow and made him my friend. I saw him, I heard him, I took care of him.

This started to dissolve old patterns, behaviors that kept me stuck in the loop of being a victim. So for the first time in my life, I could truly experience the emotional reaction of my body and mind this morning, at 6 AM September 15, 2024.

And here I am in front of you, with doubts and worries if I'll be understood, how I'll be judged. What Andrew would think about this. If he'd think that I'm a weirdo.

But I had to tell this truth for those men who got beaten by societal norms, by the system we agreed to live in.

*This post I dedicate to my one and only best friend I never knew I had. A magical human being who is staying behind me finding inner freedom.

Manuela, my wife, but she always hated not only this but all other labels we put on ourselves and others as limiting in our human nature.

We are all interconnected human beings with the same needs. Let's stop pretending we're not.

With love, Szymon. 🫶

I've seen a huge normalization of occultism these past couple of months & just wanna ensure everyone stays safe 🫶

So if you're interested in the occult as a girl, you need to be even more careful.

First of all: real male occultists don't exist.

• if they exist, then they become philosophers or actors or scientists or politicians or similar.

I have never met a 'real' male occultist in my life, it's an oxymoron. The real male occultists aren't mediocre middle-aged men sitting in some gay little clubhouse.

Know that most of these 'secret' clubs/orders are all fake & gay larpers. - Thelema, Freemasons, Hermetic Dawn, etc.

Bunch of gay loser larpers all of them, they won't teach you much other than trying to take your money and have sex with you or some shit like that.

and these twitter pseudo-occultists are even worse. I have never learned anything new about the occult from a big page on X, everything I've learned about the occult has come from my own studies & esoteric experiences.

tldr

• meme is real, don't trust these degenerates
• doing your own research & experiments is the only real way to discover the occult